I go into every movie loving it because I love movies and that's the way I treat everything, anyway. Some movies change my mind, though, and present things that I cannot abide, entertainment, or no, some movies just suck; so says I. On this and following haughty pages I review a recently viewed movie because I have a trait called douchebag and will randomly toss my entitled and lacking opinion into the fray because I think it's important enough to share. Bah! what a douche.
A Cheesy '80's Flick
The Movie Review'd
👍 Rhinestone (1984) 👍
Quick Synopsis Dickhead club owner makes a ridiculous bet with his headliner (Dolly Parton, OMFG) about turning any Joe Schmoe into a country singer. She wins and she is released from her contract, he wins and it's all the expected dickhead things. Their mark is a NY city cab driver play'd by Sylvester Stallone. Are you fuk'n serious?
+1 for the '80's locales and cars and whatnot. Brought me right back to that .... OMFG! I love cheesy '80's flicks
+1 for the '80's locales and cars and whatnot. Brought me right back to that .... OMFG! I love cheesy '80's flicks
| Made me Laugh, at least twice | |
| I cared at all | |
| People Died | |
| Better Writing (Are you serious? Stallone singing?) | |
| Kissing, for a second and it was horrible | |
| Mouthpiece got his | |
| Ridiculous Sexy Times | |
| Likable Characters, I mean, kinna | |
| Unbelievable (utterly) | |
| Made me Cry | |
| Bombs and such | |
| Big Hair | |
| Dolly Parton | |
| Romance (but, it was horrible) | |
| Horrors | |
| Cheesy '80's flick | |
| Thoughtful | |
| Charming AF | |
| Sassy, sweet, tiny Dolly Parton whallops a guy | |
| Sweet | |
| Good Music (was fine, but I'm a Jazz guy) |
Good or No
This movie was ridiculous. I heard some of the meetings in my head and in my fantasy they were all crazy - hey, man, let's get Stallone to sing. Yeah, and let's put him into a movie with Dolly Parton, I mean, she's a singer, so it tracks, and, it's fuk'n Dolly Parton - have you seen Best Little Whorehouse in Texas? Do you even...?
And let's make stallone a cabbie, and, you know, Eye-Talian, and let's have a scene with his parents...
Yeah, and let's throw in a homey down-home arc so Dolly can get all country and let's throw in some good ol' country wisdom in, too, sheeeeit, it's gonne be fabulous. Me am GEENUS!
A ridiculous flick from the '80's when almost every movie was ridiculous. We can play "count the tropes".
